Alcoholic and dating again
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! We’ve been dating for a year and a half and live together. She drinks at brunch, after a night out to help the hangovers. At first, I thought she was just a fun sorority girl who liked to go out and have fun on the weekends. She drinks to the point that she cant stand almost every weekend. I dont want to spend my entire life taking care of her or dealing with her drunkenness. Drinking as you describe it will eventually drag her down -- and you too. Your love cannot save her, and the harder you try the more miserable you will become.
Some forums can only be seen by registered members. At first, I thought she was just a fun sorority girl who liked to go out and have fun on the weekends. She drinks to the point that she can’t stand almost every weekend. Lately, its been almost embarrassing to take her to social events, as I know shes going to make a scene and stumble everywhere. You have to realize that have a right to a girlfriend who does not regularly get drunk and embarass you-- and then get defensive about it when you point out what has happened.
You can also try setting up a formal intervention if there are other friends, family, or coworkers who see her going downhill like this.
(And don't presume that the people at her job don't know.
There is nothing to be done about a person who simply doesn't want to change.
And, even if your partner does want to change, it's going to take a big handle on maturity and determination for this to even happen in the first place. Identify the problem However in order to know whether your date is indeed an alcoholic, you will have to be able to identify the symptoms.
After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads. Lately, it’s been almost embarrassing to take her to social events, as I know she’s going to make a scene and stumble everywhere. I don’t want to spend my entire life taking care of her or dealing with her drunkenness. She gets upset with herself after a day of drinking and she realizes all the money she spent and how dumb she acts. She is the only one who can do something about her drinking.
She gets upset with herself after a day of drinking and she realizes all the money she spent and how dumb she acts. The thing is, shes a very smart and successful girl. She says when I tell her that Im concerned for her, that it makes her feel bad and that she will try to control herself better. Its getting to the point that I dont even believe that she wants to change anymore. You can just ask her to stop drinking so much and see if she can.
Most counselors will counsel you against getting involved in a relationship (or making any major life decisions) so early on in your sobriety.
You need to be thinking about the adjustments YOU need in YOUR life while you're learning how not to spend time drinking.
Being in a relationship with an alcoholic is perhaps the second worst thing after being an alcoholic yourself.